


I Want To Tell You Everything Will Be Fine (remix)

by B99fangirlnextdoor



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Asexual Amy Santiago, Asexual Character, Eating Disorders, F/F, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Rape, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Remix, Written from Amy's perspective
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-26
Updated: 2019-03-16
Packaged: 2019-10-16 14:17:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17551283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/B99fangirlnextdoor/pseuds/B99fangirlnextdoor
Summary: Amy Santiago gets raped late one night. Rosa is there to help.A remix of the original written from Amy's perspective. It's not too graphic though.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [I Want To Tell You Everything Will Be Fine (but i'm afraid that it's a waste of your time)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17306345) by [shalelightstone](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shalelightstone/pseuds/shalelightstone). 



> I've wanted to do this for a while now but didn't want to step on the original creator's toes. After a week of debate, I've decided to brave it because of the lack of stories from the victims POV. Hopefully, it's not awful. 
> 
> Please look after yourself and don't read if it's going to trigger you. My Tumblr inbox is always open.

If you ever watch a movie or read a book that portrays sexual assault, there's invariably some sort of scuffle. 

I struggled at first. It was instinct. But tonight I earned a bite on my shoulder for my efforts. It threw me off enough for him to have time to pin me against my bed and rip off my clothes. 

After that, I tried to lash out, to kick, to scatch, to bite, but my body was refused to obey my orders. I just stared up at him, paralysed. 

In that moment, I didn't exist.

When he left, I became aware of how loud I was sobbing. My fist was clenching the partly ripped off sheet. The duvet lay crumpled on the floor. My clothes had been partially torn and flung across the room. My favourite lamp was broken, and I knew by feel alone that I had a black eye.

The detective in me was telling me to lock the door, then grab my phone and call for help, but I just wanted to sleep and forget this ever happened. I shuffled off the blood patch slightly and curled up on the corner of the mattress, closing my eyes.

Sirens were blaring in the distance, causing a ripple of car horns to go off as they scrambled to try to get out of the way, setting off the neighbours dog. A large group of people were stood outside, laughing. The flat below us was having a party and being rather inconsiderate about noise levels. Since when is New York so fucking loud? 

I take a couple of deep breaths in between sobs and close my eyes again.

But then some moron slams a door a few flats down, and I give in. He could break in whenever he wanted. I slowly sit myself up, all too aware of my throbbing muscles, and reach for my phone.

I panicked when I heard a key in the lock. I knew it could be Teddy, that he could be coming back to hurt me, but I was paralysed. I tried to scream, but my mouth isn't working. It was as if it was happening all over again. Like an endless reel of film, I couldn't pause.

"Can you tell me who did this to you?" I blinked. Rosa was crouched by my bed, eye level with me. When had she got here? Her tone was softer than it usually was. One I recognised from when we dealt with victims of crime at the precinct. I could tell she was scared. That she knew precisely what had gone on. I knew to tell her would be to complicate things. But I didn't want her to be sad as well, so I gave her what she wanted.

"Teddy."

My own words hit me hard. I hadn't expected my voice to be so shaky or so quiet. I certainly hadn't planned to burst into tears and begin to tremble violently when I said his name. I closed my eyes tightly, gasping for breath, begging my mind not to replay the scene. 

I was pulled from my thoughts by the sensation of warm leather being draped over my back. I knew by its familiar fragrance it was Rosa's. Then, with it, a hand rested on my shoulder. I flinched at first, as it was unexpected, but I quickly relaxed.

It's what I focused on. Her hand. The weight of it. The coconut smell that lingered in the air. The warm material that was laid against my skin, protecting my dignity. Slowly, my sobs settled.

"Amy, I'm really sorry about this, but I need you to answer this, so I know how to help you." I silently begged her not to ask, knowing if I had to speak I'd start sobbing hysterically again. " Did...did he take advantage of you?"

I swallowed, squeezing my eyes shut and clinging to the sheets as the reality of the situation came crashing down on me all at once.

Rosa's rubbing my shoulder with her thumb, bringing me out of my spiral. She's so different from the Rosa I know from work. I take a deep breath in and nod.

"Can I take you to the hospital?"

Telling Rosa was one thing, but going to the hospital and reporting it meant that it would be escalated - I'd never be able to look anyone in the NYPD in the eye again. Not after taking one of their finest officers from them.

It takes a moment for me to get my voice to work without bursting into hysterics. "I...I don't want to report it," I whisper. "You don't have to report it, I just want to get you checked out. Make sure there is no serious damage," I hesitated. It was probably a good idea. Teddy might be a cop, but I didn't know if he was clean. We were regularly in contact with all kinds of bodily fluids as part of the job. What if I caught an STD? What if I got pregnant? My parents won't let me have an abortion. Can I be a mother? Who's going to help me raise it? What about my job?

"Will you let me take you?" Rosa's voice brings me back to the present. I nod, slowly. It's a good idea. I think. "Thank you." She whispers. She stands up and goes and fetches me some comfy sweats before helping me to get dressed. It hurts, but I don't cry or whimper. I'm too tired for that.

I watch numbly as she collects my discarded clothes off the floor and places them into a bag. I know the drill. I'm a detective with the NYPD. It's just in case I change my mind about reporting it. But I won't. Simple as. I can't ruin my future before it's even begun.

Slowly, I stagger out of my room, clutching onto Rosa's arm. It hurts to walk, and I'm sure I'm bleeding again. Upon reaching the door, I turn back for one final look at my destroyed apartment as Rosa grabs my car keys and locks up. "Come on, let's get you out of here." She whispers, guiding me down to her car.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amy and Rosa reach the hospital

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one took me a few days to compose. I tried to make it as accurate as possible, while also incorporating Amy's feelings into it. Speak to any survivor and most of them will tell you the SAEK is another trauma in itself.
> 
> NB: excuse the spelling, I'm British. We spell things differently in UK English VS US English

When we pulled up outside the hospital, I felt sick. I looked a mess, and now I was going to have to wait in a room full of people staring at me. "I won't leave you, okay?" Rosa whispered, reaching over the centre console to hold my hand. I nod my head, pulling her oversized jacket around my body.

Rosa is trying to help me out of the car when it strikes me. Teddy could be in there looking for me. Noting my hesitation, Rosa stops pulling me up and instead crouches down. "You scared?" I nod. "Do you want me to call reception and see if we can get you straight into a side room?" I nod again. "Okay." Rosa stands up and closes the door, standing guard as she makes the call.

"Okay, the said they'd got a side room we can head to, but we've got to walk through the ER waiting room to get there." I sit myself up, trying to control my shaky breath. Teddy could be waiting there for me. He was my boyfriend, so he was next of kin, which means they'll tell him everything. Rosa rubs my hand "I know it's not ideal, but you can hold onto me, and I'll get you through as quickly as possible, okay?" I nodded, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, reminding myself I had Rosa, the NYPD's most badass detective.

Rosa leads me through the automatic doors at the hospital. I'm instantly hit with the bright, unforgiving lights and smell of bleach as we enter. I try to focus on the sound of Rosa's heeled boots on the clean laminate floor as we enter the busy ER waiting room, but I can't stop myself from freezing as I automatically scan the room for Teddy, oblivious to the sudden fall of silence. A mother who was sat a few meters away from where we're stood picks up her toddler and begins to rock him. Everyone else gawps. Rosa strokes my hand and murmurs reassurances in Spanish as I continue to study the room frantically. 

Where was he? I knew he was hiding here somewhere, waiting to pounce. Why didn't I agree to have sex? If I had, I wouldn't be stood here like a prize hog at a fair. I'm so stupid. I should have just said yes.

It's Rosa who notices I'm spiralling first. She squeezes my hand to bring my focus back to her; then she attracts the attention of a receptionist, who, upon realising who I am (not that difficult to work out), shows us into a quiet side room. Sensing my hesitation, Rosa goes in first. Turning around after a brief look around the room she nods at me, and I shuffle into the small room, perching myself on the end of the bed. "The nurse will be though in a moment." I had forgotten the receptionist was with us, and her voice makes me jump. She smiles at me before leaving, closing the door behind her. 

Now we're alone; I cling onto Rosa, who's standing between me and the door. "You worried he's going to come here looking for you?" I nod, still gripping onto her top. "He won't; it's too risky." She whispers "But if for whatever reason he does show up, I'm not going to let him anywhere near you, chica." Rosa perches next to me, rubbing my back as tones of hushed Spanish tumble from her lips. 

Eventually, I begin to calm down, so Rosa shifts onto a nearby chair but continues holding my hand. "I know you don't want to report it, but do you think you might let them do a SAEK?" I instantly stiffen and pull my hand away. SAEK stood for Sexual Assault Evidence Kit, more commonly referred to as a rape kit, and I knew I didn't want one. "I know it's scary, but it means if you do decide to report it, you've all the evidence you need right there."

In theory, it sounds like a good idea, but being a detective, I know exactly what goes on in them. One of the first parts is telling the SANE ( Sexual Assult Nurse Examiner) what happened, in detail. Rosa and I have worked together for years, and we've even gone into active shooter situations as partners. Even so, I am not talking about what happened, not to her, not to anyone. 

"Amy?" Rosa gently reaches out and squeezes my hand, bringing my attention back to her. "Are you scared about talking about what happened?" I nod. "We can skip that part if you want, and just do the collection?" I hesitate for a second "If you want I'll stay with you and speak for you?" I look into Rosa's kind eyes and give a small nod, making Rosa smile. "Thank you."

About 15 minutes later, a SANE (Sexual Assult Nurse Examiner) nurse in her mid-thirties walked in "I'm nurse Regan, and I'm going to perform your SAEK today," She turned to Rosa "Miss, would you mind waiting outside?" I whimpered and clung onto Rosa's hand tighter. "I'm staying." Rosa suddenly seemed a lot more like Rosa with a scowl on her face. The nurse sighed "Okay, just be aware you could be called upon as a witness if this goes to court." I closed my eyes and gripped Rosa's hand tighter at the thought of court. Rosa stands up and pulls me into her chest, so I don't see the evil looks she shoots the nurse. "We don't have to worry about that right now." 

"Okay, the first thing I'm going to ask is for your consent. This test is split into different parts, and you can consent to some of them, none of them or all of them, although be aware the more you consent to the more likely we are to get a prosecution if this is reported. You can ask me to stop, pause or skip a step at any time, even if you've consented already. Do you understand?" Taking a deep breath, I nod.

The first part is the part I don't even want to think about. "Can you tell me what happened tonight?" Rosa interjects for me "She wants to skip this part." The nurse raises an eyebrow but doesn't comment and moves onto the next section.

I sit quietly as my vitals were taken and recorded on a sheet. Next, it's the mouth swabs. "These get rubbed around your mouth, between your gum and cheek, under your tongue and over your gums, okay?" I nod and reach out to take the first Q tip from her, but she pulls away. "I do this part." I sigh and open my mouth. When both of those are sufficiently covered in saliva (urah) the nurse rubs them on a slide and leaves it out to dry before picking up what looks like a tiny brush and rubbing the insides of my cheek. It tickles. 

I'm then asked to stand on a piece of paper and undress. I glance up at Rosa as I let go of her hand and shuffle uncertainly onto the cool paper. "It's okay, chica." She continues to murmur her praises in Spanish as I close my eyes, take a deep breath, and slide Rosa's leather jacket off my shoulders. I don't want to give it up, but I hold it out to the nurse so she can pop it in the paper bag she's rustling. 

Before I know it, I'm stood stark naked in front of a complete stranger. I can tell Rosa's trying not to react to my bruised body, and it proves too much for me. I furiously wipe away the tears as I brace myself to be touched. The gloved nurse runs her hands through my hair and down my body. Certain parts are sore and tender to the touch, while others I don't want her touching at all, but I force myself to stand still and focus on Rosa's praises.

The nurse stands upright, turning around to go through the checklist. "What language are you speaking to her?" Rosa glances at me as if to ask permission. I nod. "Spanish." The nurse looks up from the sheet, smiling "It's always nice when we get sisters in here." Rosa snorts "No, we're friends, we just happen to be able to speak Spanish." The nurse shuts up after that.

Picking up what looks like a torch, the nurse shines it over my body. A small blob on the back of my leg glows, and the nurse runs a wet q tip over it, making me jump slightly. She does the same with the bite on my shoulder, but this time I'm braced, and I don't flinch when she presses the cool q tip against my wound (although it does sting badly).

The nurse pulls out a camera and asks me to turn around. I tried not to get self-conscious as she took photos of the finger marks across my breasts, but fail. I knew it had to be done, so I tolerate+ it, following the nurse's orders and changing my position as appropriate. That photo of me throwing up into a pillowcase is no longer the worst photo of me in existence.

"This next part feels a bit like a manicure." The nurse grins. I blink and look over at Rosa, who is rolling her eyes. Holding my hand over yet another piece of paper (over the part I'm stood on) the nurse runs what looks like a toothpick under each nail. I'm then handed a comb and asked to comb through my hair. I do my head first, gently teasing the knots out, making sure the stray hairs fall on the paper. When that's done, I take a deep breath and comb through my pubic hair, which I can safely say I'm never doing again.

I'm eventually handed a gown, so I didn't have to be naked anymore and asked to sit on the bed. Rosa helps me into the hospital gown. When she's finished, I wipe my eyes, take Rosa's hand and watch as it's all carefully wrapped up and put into the collection with the swabs.

The subsequent test is what I consider to be the worst bit of the test.

"Were you penetrated vaginally?" I nod. "Anally?" I pause to think, my cheeks flushing red, before shaking my head. "Okay, lie back against the bed for me." Taking a deep breath, I close my eyes, tighten my grip on Rosa's hand, and allow myself to be swabbed 'down there'. It hurts. I try not to cry again, but I'm overtired and embarrassed. 

Next up were the injections. Luckily for me, I'm not scared of needles, although Rosa is. She had to look away when she saw the needle, which made me feel brave, just for a second. Once that was done, I was given a little silver packet with a single pill in it. I knew what it was even before the nurse explained it to me. I took it from her, wiping my eyes. The thought of a living thing growing inside of me, like a tapeworm, made me feel sick. "And this is your HIV prophylaxis." The nurse handed me a bottle of blue pills. I took them, squeezing my eyes shut and leaning into Rosa as I did so. I was officially at a substantial risk of HIV.

I had only stopped snuffling when the psychiatrist came in, making me nearly jump out of my skin. She was an older lady, with a kind smile and silver grey hair. "I'm sorry miss, this is a private consultation, would you mind waiting outside?" Rosa glared at her, and for a second I was petrified she was going to beat her up, but then she glances up at me, asking my permission wordlessly. I wanted her to stay, but we'd been in here three hours now, and she needed a break, so I nodded for her to go. 

The psychiatrist didn't stay for long. She asked me a few yes/no questions regarding my mental state (I just nodded/ shook my head) and then gave me a card for free counselling. As she left, Rosa came back in with the nurse, armed with discharge papers. I signed them, and we were left in peace.

“Do you want to go back to my place?” Rosa asked as she helped me get into a rather uncomfortable top from lost and found. I nodded, a little surprised she'd offered. Normally I wouldn't want to impose, but my own home didn't feel safe anymore. “I called Holt while you were in psych. We will get some sleep, and then I told Holt that we were going to come in and talk to him about what happened. Again, we don’t have to report it as a crime; we need to keep you safe.” I nodded again. I didn't want to tell him, but we were both exhausted, and I didn't want to stress her out further. Now fully dressed, Rosa helped me to my feet and escorted me out of the room, staying slightly ahead of me at all times.

Rosa stood patiently as my legs once again froze at the sight of the ER waiting room, allowing me to scan for him before I relaxed a little and could walk again. Walking through a dark car park was also tough. Every shadow made me jump, and I would freeze every time I heard footsteps. But Rosa let me take my time, whispering her consolations in Spanish and rubbing my hand until I could move again.

I was grateful to be sitting in the safety of my car finally. I was so tired, but I couldn't sleep. Every time I began to drift off, I saw Teddy. So, instead, I watched the city lights through bleary eyes. The sky was a beautiful blue colour. I think they call this blue hour.

Rosa pulled into the parking garage, jumping out of the car before helping me get out and stagger up to her apartment. Unlocking the door, she showed me through to her bedroom and dug through her draws before pulling out a t-shirt and leggings. I perched on the end of Rosa's bed as she assisted me to get out of the itchy bleach scented clothes I'd been given into ones that smelled like coconut. "Take the bed." She whispers, pulling her top over her head.

This is Rosa Diaz we're talking about here. This was her apartment. Nobody in the NYPD (apart from Jake) knew where she lived. Teddy wasn't going to find me here. Even if he did, Rosa is a trained detective who has successfully tackled men twice her weight, and I know for a fact she's numerous weapons hidden around the house, but even here I didn't feel safe. 

Maybe if she lay with me?

I watch Rosa as she gets changed into her PJs, trying to get my mouth to work. “Can you sleep here with me?” Rosa's head shot up, suppressed surprise evident on her face. She nodded and walked over to me, settling herself on the bed as I allowed myself to fall against the pillows.

“Do you want me to hold you tonight?” I nodded, knowing I'd probably feel better with Rosa close. She very gently laid an arm over my midriff. I don't know if it was because I was in bed, if it was where Rosa rested her arm, or just me being an overemotional idiot, but I began to bawl again. 

"Come here." I rolled over onto my side and allowed Rosa to pull me into her arms, gently rubbing my back as I sobbed into her pillow. “We’ll figure this out. I promise.” She whispers as she kisses my head. I lean myself into her warm body and close my eyes, inevitably relaxing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a tough chapter to write. I did plenty of research into it, which wasn't easy as 1) I'm British. Things are done VERY differently over here. 2) SAEKs vary between states, and a lot of checklists aren't available online. 3) The exam is tailored to the individual. 
> 
> I tried to just do a general overview of what *normally* happens, but like I say this may change or vary.
> 
> A side note to anyone in the US finding themselves in this situation: Please ring beforehand. Not all hospitals can do SAEKs, and it is not pleasant to go driving around looking for a hospital when you feel like shit
> 
> I hope to have the third chapter up by the end of this week, absolute latest.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amy and Rosa get ready for their meeting with Holt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if this is any good, I've tried writing it and rewriting it and I'm finally satisfied its not a complete embarrassment, but constructive criticism/tips are appreciated
> 
> Thank you for the support so far!
> 
> PS: I won't be doing ch 4 until ch 5 is uploaded by the original authour. I can't bear to wait in between ch(s)

I awoke to the sensation of Rosa gently shaking me. She stroked my arm as I opened my eyes and stretched out my legs under the warm duvet. “Hey, we need to get ready to go talk to Holt, okay?” I push myself into a sit, not realising how much it was going to hurt. I take in the evening light that's streaming through the blinds, blinking as Rosa gets out of bed and heads over to her wardrobe. 

“Do you want to shower before we leave?” I nod. I need to wash what remains of last night off me. Besides, Rosa might have persuaded me to talk to Holt, but there was no way I was showing up in the state I was in currently. Rosa passes me a towel, an NYPD tee shirt and a pair of black joggers. 

I waste no time in staggering into the bathroom, closing the door, and turning the water on. I carefully place one foot over the edge of the bath, then the other. Even though I'm expecting it, I flinch at the feel of water, and last night comes flooding back to me all at once.

There was something about being fucked that made me feel... disgusting. I know that other loving couples (like Teddy and I) not only have sex but enjoy it. The thought of him being inside me repulsed me; it felt so dirty and wrong, so mundane. 

He had been.

Tears begin to stream down my cheek as I pick up Rosa's Lofa and scrub at my skin furiously. He was all over me, and he wasn't coming off. I turned the water to as hot as it would go and sat under it. It burned, but at least now I had a chance of getting rid of him. Pouring copious amounts of soap onto my skin, I continued to scrub furiously.

Why didn't I want to have sex? Why was something I was meant to enjoy feel so... wrong? What was wrong with me? Why couldn't I say yes? It was wrong of me to deny him. He loved me, and he wanted to express that love. Why wouldn't I let him?

A blast of cold air hit my skin. Slowly the bath curtain was being pulled back. I froze. It was Teddy. He had come for me. Where was Rosa? Had he hurt her? Was she okay? I should never have let her take me back to hers. This was a bad idea. A terrible idea. I've put her in danger, and now she's hurt, and it's all my fault.

I have never been gladder to see Rosa in all my life. It's not Teddy. I was safe. She was safe. Rosa turned off the water and laid a fluffy towel over my back. I pulled it around myself, suddenly cold. Rosa lowered herself onto the floor outside the tub opposite me. “Amy, can you tell me what is going on in your mind?”

What is going on? Should I tell her I didn't want to? Should I tell her that it makes me feel dirty and disgusting? I was confident she wouldn't laugh, but what if she thought I was weird? What if she told Holt? Oh God, I can't have him finding out about my sex life issues. 

"Let's get you dressed and dry, okay?" Rosa's words cut through my mind. She helped me out of the tub and got me dried and dressed. I stood there, like a baby. I hope she doesn't tell Holt about this. Or anyone else for that matter. 

Now that I was dressed, Rosa sat me on the toilet lid before perching on the edge of the bath. I knew she was going to make me talk. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea. Perhaps if I tell her, she could help me work this out. But what if Teddy finds out? Or what if she secretly reports it behind my back? Can you do that? I don't know if you can. 

“Can you tell me what you’re thinking?” I stare at my upper thighs. Now was my chance to have someone listen to me. To help me figure out this mess. I work my mouth for a second, trying to form the words. “I didn’t want to.”

“Didn’t want to what, chica?” All of a sudden, everything came tumbling out of my mouth before I could stop it. “I never wanted to have sex with him, I know I should have. I know that is what couples do, I didn’t want to. I never wanted to; I never wanted to have sex with anyone. I don’t know why. It’s not right. He deserved it. I get why he did what he did." Surprisingly, that felt a little bit better. 

“Amy, it is never your fault. The scumbag took advantage of you. You do not owe anyone anything, especially sex. If you don’t want to have sex, that is your decision, no one else's. Do you understand?" Rosa hadn't been this firm with me since she found me last night. I know she truly believed that its 'never the victim's fault' but in my case it was. If I said yes, I wouldn't have been raped. Simple as. He was my partner. We were meant to make sacrifices for each other. “Promise me; you will not blame yourself.” I nod, only because I don't want Rosa to worry. 

Do you want anything to eat?” I shook my head. Breakfast smelt delicious but I knew to eat would be to gain, and, besides, we had a meeting soon and had to get ready so we weren't late. Rosa thankfully didn't push the issue and went about feeding herself while I got ready. I may have stolen Rosa's makeup, but when she saw me, she just raised an eyebrow "Looking foxy Santiago." I manage a small smile. 

Hopefully, with this makeup on, Holt won't think it's a big issue and make me report it. I'm not sure you can force someone to report it anyway, but it's not worth the risk.

"Ready?" Rosa asked as I stood up, dressed head to toe in her clothes (and makeup). I don't feel ready. I want to go back to bed and sleep for another week or four. But I know to say 'no' would result in Rosa worrying more, so I nod my head.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rosa and Amy go to their meeting with Holt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long guys.
> 
>  
> 
> Ch 5 of the original is now up, and I'm writing my ch 5 now, but I probably won't post it until ch 6 of the original is up.
> 
> Comments, Kudus and advice always appreciated 
> 
> Thank you to my supporters so far <3

How do you tell your mentor that you've been raped? That was the number one question floating around my mind as Rosa drove me to the precinct. I didn't know where to begin. Do I blurt it out? Do I write it down and give it to him? Oh my God, what if he couldn't look at me anymore? What if all he saw when he did was 'the' girl who'd been raped? 

Maybe this wasn't a good idea.

If I didn't tell him I couldn't go back to my flat. What do I do? Move out? Will I ever feel safe on my own? Will I have to move in with Rosa or, worse, my parents? If Rosa won't have me, then I'll have to move in with them. I'll have to give up my dream job and rely on my parents for everything like I was ten again. This was not how my life was supposed to go. 

"Amy?" 

I blinked a few times and looked up at Rosa who had suddenly gone pale. "You okay?" I nod "We're here. I'm going to take you in the back way, okay?" Rosa slides her hand across the centre console, just like she did last night at the hospital. "I'm so proud of you, chica." I don't know what she was proud of me for, all I was doing is going to speak to captain Holt like I'd done a thousand times before, but even so I appreciated the praise.

Rosa whispered soft Spanish as she guided me into the lift and, eventually, out into the bullpen. He hand rested on my lower back, gently propelling me forwards. The captain's office already had the blinds drawn, but the door, unlike usual, was open. Rosa stopped me in the doorway as he appeared to be working. It only took a few seconds before he glanced up and saw us standing there.

Holt stood up, closing the door behind us and gesturing at the two seats in front of his desk. “Is everything okay, Detectives?” Something was wrong with his tone. It was as if he was... worried? Oh my God. Captain Holt is worried about me. Is it wrong to ask for a paper bag when you're about to have a meeting with your boss/mentor?

"Want me to start?" I nodded, shaking slightly. It felt like a giant bubble of doom had swallowed me whole, creating an uncomfortable tightness in my chest. What if Teddy found out we had this meeting? What if he tracked me down? What if he hurt Rosa?

Rosa slipped her hand into mine, and for some reason, it settled me as she began to speak. Okay. Last night Detective Santiago called me around midnight, asking me to come over. She had been attacked, and I took her to the hospital, where I called you.”Rosa squeezed my hand. It was my turn. I spun around for a second, to check Teddy wasn't there, before setting my sights firmly on my feet and coordinating my mouth so it would let me speak. "He..." A screaming voice in my head was telling me to run far away and never come back. I seriously considered it for a second. "... raped me." Once I started, I couldn't stop “I was at home, and he came over and… he was drunk, and he wanted sex and …” I realised I didn't want to go into the details. Was that enough? I glanced up at my captain; his face had changed. Sympathy and anger. “Can you tell me who?” His tone was softer, gentler.

Oh, God. I was going to be 'the' girl who got raped, wasn't I? 

I shouldn't tell him. If I did, that's all I'll ever be. I don't think he'd believe me anyway. Teddy was so gentle. I thought about all the vulnerable people Teddy had contact with as part of his job. I knew it was probably a one-off. I was a cop. I should have been able to fight him off. I couldn't. A citizen doesn't stand a chance. I had a duty as an NYPD officer to serve and protect. Nobody was going to believe a citizen that came in off the streets and said he raped them. Teddy could be with someone now... doing it.

"Teddy...Wells."  
Just like that, it was out. Officially beyond my control. He could find out and come back for me. I waited for the dread and the panic to hit me, but it didn't. I was just... numb.

A trace of anger lingered on Holt's face. “I would suggest you formally report this. We can do it here or at another precinct, wherever you would be more comfortable, but you should. I don’t think you should return to your apartment for a while. Stay with Diaz. Take some time off if you feel you need it. We will go from there. Are you going to report this?”

Holt was my mentor and my captain. I did what he told me, immediately and without question. But this was different. The consequences of reporting rape were often dire. If he were found guilty (unlikely because out of all the cases I've seen only a handful made it to court, and only 2 of the offenders had been found guilty.) then he'd probably lose his job. Jake was nearly killed after he arrested Sophia's boss for possession. And all the charges were dropped. 

Rosa squeezed my hand. She found Jake before it was too late. I briefly glanced up at Holt. He'd spent his entire career being threatened by superior officers but still made it to the top. Between the two of them, they weren't going to let anything bad happen to me. I squeezed Rosa's hand back, took a deep breath, and nodded. Holt looked pleased with me, and, just for a second, I was proud of myself.

"I don't want to do it here." Reporting it was one thing but telling someone from the night shift what happened was another. I didn't want the gossip floating around the precinct, although it was likely to happen at some point. “Not a problem. I will call over to the Nine-Five. Diaz, will you be able to take Santiago over?” Rosa smiled a little “Of course, Sir. Thank you." 

With that, the hellish meeting was over. Certainly not one I ever want to remember, but one that was probably going to change life as I knew it forever. Holt was kind enough to open the door for us “You will get through this Amy. You will be okay." I believed him. He'd never let me down before. 

Seeing the look he was giving Rosa; I decided to excuse myself "I'm just going to nip to the bathroom." I don't know what he said to Rosa when I was out of earshot, but I had a feeling it was something along the lines of keeping me safe and out of danger, which is silly because I don't need a babysitter.

Having finally reached the bathroom, I glanced around to make sure nobody was coming before pushing the door open. It seemed so big and empty in there, so I waited with my back to the wall outside of it, carefully eying the corridors just in case Teddy decided to show up. I jumped when I heard footsteps, but it was only Rosa. She waited until she was closer before whispering "You want me to go in with you, Santiago?" I nodded, blushing. I have been in this bathroom a thousand times before; I was a cop who'd taken down mass murders twice my size, but apparently, I couldn't go to the bathroom without Rosa.

I waited outside as Rosa searched the bathroom, only going in when Rosa assured me it was safe. She kept watch by the door, back turned so I could have some privacy. When I was done, she led me back to the car and began driving us to the nine - five.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Car rides with Rosa Diaz are awkward enough without being on your way to report a rape.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am SO SORRY this took so long guys! I promise ch 6 will be up as soon as OP publishes ch 7 <3

I stared out the window, watching the raindrops trickle down it, the continual hum of the car engine echoing my mind as we made our way across town. 

If I thought telling my mentor/ captain would be hard, I knew telling Rosa would be harder. I couldn't bear the thought of her knowing what happened, but at the same time, I wanted her to be there. I don't think I could do it alone.

I don't see how everything could hurt this much from just sitting here like a sack of potatoes. Maybe I was getting to be like one of those old ladies who could tell when storms are coming. Probably not ideal, given I should be heading out for a run right about now.

It was so silly, I was a cop, I took down hardened criminals for a living, but I couldn't protect myself from him. I had taken down men bigger and stronger than him single-handedly but once he bit me, I just... froze. It doesn't make sense. If some dumb perp bit me in an alleyway somewhere, I'd have retaliated and defended myself. Out of all the people to get raped by Tedy seemed so ... unlikely. He was boring and sane and definitely not the rapist sort, only now he apparently was? I haven't even broken it off with him. I just assumed he'd assume it was over given he... but what if he didn't? Oh God, I'm dating a rapist.

“Háblame, chica, [ talk to me] ”

"What about?"

"Just tell me what's running through your mind."

I sighed, and turned to gaze at Rosa, she was trying to be nice to me, and for some reason, I felt... safe with her. She wasn't going to judge me. She had been there from the start, and she deserved to know what I was thinking. I closed my eyes and let it all stream out

“I don’t know. I’m tired and sore. Everything hurts. And I am angry, I’m angry at Teddy, I’m angry at myself. I should have just had sex with him when he wanted it, or I should have been able to stop him. I’m a cop for god’s sake. If I can’t prevent myself from getting attacked, how am I supposed to help other people? And I’m fat and ugly and…”

I trail off as Rosa grabs my shoulders, grounding me. For a second I panic over who's driving the car, but then I open my eyes and realise that actually, she's pulled over. I feel like crying, but I can't muster the tears so instead, I allow her to support my body as she reassures me. “Look at me. It is not your fault. It. Is. Not. Your. Fault. And you are a great cop, the best damn detective I know, better than Peralta, better than anyone. You hear me?” Rosa's tone startled me a little. It wasn't quite harsh, but it certainly wasn't gentle either. Why did that feel so good? What was wrong with me? Why was I taking pleasure in her yelling at me? I usually hated being yelled at, especially by people I look up to. It just felt so right, and normal like nothing ever happened and...

Ah.

“Also, you are not fat. Who put that thought in your mind?” I blinked hazily at my companion. “Erm... Teddy told me I would look better if I lost some weight,” 

I didn't realise what I was saying until I watched Rosa's face contort in anger, guilt consuming me. It wasn't what she thought. Lot's of people wanted to lose weight, and Teddy wasn't wrong, I could have done with losing a few pounds here and there, just like a lot of people could, it wasn't bad, I jus-

“Fuck that guy. He is an abusive dick. Are you starving yourself?” 

Her tone had gone soft again, only confirming my worst fears. The tears were no longer refusing to flow. Rosa unbuckled her seatbelt and moved, so she was sitting on the centre console of the car, her back against the dash, legs toward the back of the vehicle. It didn't look exactly comfortable, but I'm glad she didn't sit in my lap; I'd have only got snot all over her top.

I flinched slightly as Rosa rested two fingers against my arm, gently tracing up and down as my tears began to slow down. “When was the last time you ate a real meal?” She really didn't want to know the answer to that. I settle with a shrug and glance up at Rosa, who also looks like she's about to cry. I didn't think it was possible to feel more shit than I did when I was being raped, but this was pretty close. I was venting on her, and she couldn't handle it. I was making Rosa Diaz cry.

 

“I… I’m not anorexic or anything, I want to eat, he… he just got to me. He made me think that nobody would love me unless I lost weight,” That was a shit explanation, but she seemed to be buying it, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand before her tears could ruin her perfect eyeliner. “Do you still want to continue to the precinct?" I hesitated for a second as Rosa rubbed the tearstains off my cheek. I didn't want to make Rosa feel any worse than she did, but at the same time, Teddy could be out there... doing it again. Nobody would ever believe his victims. A highly decorated placid cop a rapist. Give me a break. Never going to happen in a million years.

Only it did.

I nodded and turned to stare out the window at the raindrops as Rosa shifted herself back into the driver's seat. There's a pause before she nudges my arm with a protein bar as the engine bursts into life. I take the bar without protest, knowing this was the least I could do for dragging her into this mess in the first place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think! Kudus, Comments and advice are ALWAYS appreciated <3


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amy finally tells her story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning:
> 
> This chapter is graphic. It describes rape and abusive relationships in detail. Please don't read if it might affect you.
> 
>  
> 
> Otherwise enjoy, leave comments, kudus and advice so I know how I'm doing :)

"Can you tell me what happened that night?"

I gulped, staring at my feet and tracing the patterns of mud on them with my eyes as the noises of the bullpen faded away. I was really doing it. This could all go so wrong so fast. It felt like an elephant was sitting on my chest, and my mind was screaming at me not to tell the nice officer whose name I've already forgotten. I never forget a name. What was wrong with me?

"Amy?"

Rosa's voice was gentle. Soft. It was the same tone she'd used the night she found me. Her 'victim' voice. She reached over and rested her hand on my knee. I automatically flinched, but quickly relaxed once I realised it was her.

"Can you give us a minute?"

The kind officer nodded and stood up, leaving us sat alone at his desk.

“Háblame, chica, [ talk to me] ”

I shook my head. I couldn't possibly cry again. I must have used up all my tears in the last few days, but it felt like I was going to yet again. "I can't. I'm so sorry." Rosa squeezed my knee "What can I do to make it better?" I scoff, eyes not moving from my shoes. "Turn back the clock and tell me not to let him in?" She squeezed my knee again "I can't do that, chica, but what I can do is help you through the now." I nodded, looking up and around me at the crowded bullpen that surrounded us. Teddy could easily walk in off the street if he wanted to. I needed to go somewhere safe. Where he couldn't find me. "Can we go somewhere else to talk about this?" Rosa nodded "Let me just get Clive."

So that was his name.

* * *

 

Clive found us a small, quiet room to sit in. It was bright and airy. On one side of the room was a small couch. On the other was a wooden chair and a desk with a computer resting on it. Clive gestured for us to take a seat on the couch. "I forgot we had this place; otherwise I'd have taken you here to start with." I nod absent-mindedly and perch on the couch alongside Rosa. "Feel free to make yourselves comfy. Do you want a drink or a biscuit?" I shook my head. Biscuits were calorie hotspots, and I wasn't thirsty. Clive just nodded, turning around to log onto his computer.

"Do you want to lie on my lap?"

Normally I'd have said no. It was the height of unprofessionalism. But I was tired, and on the verge of crying already, so I nodded and kicked my shoes off. Rosa shifted herself, so when I reclined, I was leaning against her side, resting my head on her shoulder as she rubbed my arm.

"Can you tell me what happened the night of the 18th?"

Rosa rubbed her thumb over my shoulder, whispering her reassurances in Spanish as I closed my eyes and allowed myself to transport back to that night.

* * *

  
I was watching 'Training Day' and stuffing my face full of takeaway from that nice polish place when a knock echoed through my apartment. Placing my take out container on the coffee table, I brushed myself off and headed over to the door, sticking my eye up against the peephole. It was Teddy. I wasn't expecting him, but I fancied the company, so I decided to let him in.

"Hey, babe." Teddy leaned in and kissed me. "Hi." I closed the door behind him as he held up a container of his favourite pilsners. "Look what I brought!" I grin and show him into my living room "I had takeout tonight, so excuse the mess, do you want me to order anything for you?" Teddy frowned as he picked up a box of takeaway "Babe, what did we talk about? You can't be having takeout every night." My heart sinks as I struggle to swallow a rapidly forming lump in my throat. "It was just for tonight. I've had a really long day and I-" Teddy cuts me off with a raise of his hand "I don't want to hear it." I nod, taking a seat next to him "You can have what's left of mine." Teddy snorts, picking up a box "There's not much left, is there?" Instead of recoiling, I snuggle closer to him, despite feeling alarmingly empty when my skin brushes against his. "Don't try to cuddle your way out of this. I'm sick of coming home to find you've been secretly stuffing your face." This time I do recoil, wiping my eyes as I sit up and shift myself away from him. "Give me a break Amy. I'm only saying this because I love you and I don't want you to get fat." It shouldn't hurt anymore, but it does. I stare down at my thighs and trace the gap between them with my fingertip. "Not nice is it?" I shake my head, tears dripping down my cheeks.

We watch 'Training Day' in silence for a bit while Teddy munches what's left of my takeout and drinks his pilsner (s). But all too soon he's finished. "Come here, babe." I hesitantly scooch over to him and allow him to pull me against his chest. "You're so beautiful, do you know that?" I didn't feel beautiful. I felt disgusting and ugly and gross, but I nodded as he pulled me into a kiss.

After a while of sitting there feeling like a slimy, bitter tuna was flapping around in my mouth, I pull away, licking the taste of him out of my mouth hurridly. "How about we go out? It's not too late; we could go ice skating?" Teddy shook his head "That sounds nice..." He slid his hand down over my breast, squeezing one firmly before continuing down towards my crotch "... but how about we stay in and have a little fun instead?" I shake my head, pushing his arm away "I-I'm not ready yet." Teddy's face falls "I know I'll be ready eventually, I just, I want to get to know you better, you know?" Teddy sighed, standing up abruptly and nearly knocking me onto the floor. "We've been dating for six months. I've taken you ice skating, rollerblading, to movies, to a bunch of stationery shops and let you shop around for hours, I've taken you to near on every damn restaurant in Brooklyn!" I nodded, tears streaming down my cheeks. He was right. We'd had lots of nice bonding time. This was what normal couples did. Why didn't I want it?

  
"When are you going to be ready? Because honestly, I'm running out of ideas and places to take you to here." I wiped my eyes "I know. I'm so sorry Teddy. I just-" Teddy cuts me off as he sits back down next to me " Hey... no need for tears. I'm sorry I yelled at you. You're just so fucking beautiful and... well... a man has needs, you know?" I nodded, letting him rub the tears from my face. "You're just scared. That's okay. We can work with that. You just relax, and I'll show you the ropes, okay?" I pull away from Teddy, police instincts kicking in as I stand up "No." Teddy stands up, reaching out to me "It's okay, it only hurts a little bit the first time, then, afterwards, it feels really good, okay?" On the outside, I'm shaking my head and backing away from him, but on the inside, I'm screaming at myself. What the fuck is wrong with me? He was trying to be nice and give me a good time, but I didn't want it?

"Look, just... come here, I'll take it nice and slow, and we can even go into the bedroom if you want." Teddy firmly wraps his hands around me - I instinctively try to push him away, but my arms are trembling too much for it to be effective. "Hey, don't struggle; you'll hurt yourself, just relax." I continue trying to scrabble out of his arms frantically, but I'm frustratingly weak. "Hey!" Teddy tightens his grip "I said no struggling. I know you're scared, but you don't need to make this difficult."

With that, he picks me up, carrying me to my bedroom and throwing me onto the bed. It doesn't hurt, but it's a shock, and it stuns me enough to give him time to climb on top of me "Amy... Amy looked at me, just relax. This is going to feel good, okay?" It wasn't. I knew it wasn't. I already felt like my skin was crawling. He needed to get the fuck off me. I was an NYPD police officer. I should be able to kick him off. I tried, and he stumbled back for a second, but quickly lept back on top of me, biting down on my shoulder.

After that, I was just... paralysed.

"Next time I do it harder." He growled, pulling my top and bra over my head pressing a sloppy rough kiss to my lips as he tugged my pants down. "Such a beautiful girlie. I can't believe you're all mine." I stared up at the ceiling, counting the lines where the wallpaper wasn't applied correctly as Teddy leaned in, growling "Don't. Move." in my ear before sitting up and undressing himself. I tried to move, but I couldn't. My mind felt foggy, and the surrounding world felt so far away.

And then, suddenly, it wasn't.

I yelped as Teddy forced himself into me, his hands pressing my shoulders firmly into the mattress. All I could think about was the pain. I tried to get my mouth to work - to ask him to stop because I was on the verge of crying and it felt like he was ripping my insides up, but it wasn't having any of it. So I just lay there, arm over my face, crying while he made all manner of creepy grunting noises.

"Doesn't that feel so much better?" I force myself to nod as Teddy sighs contentedly and rolls onto his back, finally releasing my shoulders. I curl into a ball and close my eyes, trying to ignore the pain. We lie there awkwardly for a few seconds before he speaks up "I should probably go, I've work in the morning." I just nod again. I felt too numb to do anything else. He presses a sloppy kiss to my cheek, stands up, gets dressed and lets himself out without another word, leaving me curled up on the mattress, trembling so hard it hurt.

 

* * *

 

Rosa looked like she was going to explode with anger. I sit myself up, awkwardly wiping my eyes as Clive finishes taking the notes. "Have you got what you need?" Clive nods, fiddling about for a few moments longer before standing up and opening the door for us. As per usual, Rosa guides me out, only pausing to shake Clive's hand “Thank you for coming in,” I force a small smile "We will contact you again shortly, but for now, go get some rest." Rosa gently pulls me forward, showing me down the corridor as clive walks alongside us "If I am going to be honest with you, this is probably going to go to court, and it may not be pretty." I nod. I knew this. I'd seen too many rape cases go to pot during my career. But I'm proud I'm at least trying, and I can tell Rosa is as well. Upon reaching the door, Clive holds it open for us, watching as we left "I am so sorry this happened.”

Yeah. Me too.

* * *

 

"Can I drive?" Rosa nods as she unlocks my car, passing me the keys before jumping in the passenger side. It feels weird driving again, but it's a good weird. Like my life is finally getting back together again.

Only it wasn't.

This could go horribly wrong. I might be forced to transfer. I could lose Rosa. I would be known as the 'rape girl' by my new prescient. Then when I try to rise through the ranks like I've done my entire life, nobody is going to want to promote me. Teddy was probably going to lose his job over me. Why would someone promote the girl who got one of the NYPD's best officers fired?

Next thing I know, I'm pulling into the parking garage, and Rosa's staring at me. "Let's get in." I nod and slip the keys out of the engine, open my door, and stagger out. Rosa's already waiting for me. She props me up against her ribcage and wraps her arm around my shoulder. I nuzzle into her and let the tears flow.

She helps me up the stairs, unlocks my apartment, and assists me through the door as I stagger to the couch. We sit on it for a while, just until I calm down, my body pressed up against her chest as she rubs my arms.

  
Eventually, the tears slow down. Rosa gently shifts me off her so she can close the door and grab herself a beer from the fridge "Want one?" I shake my head. Beer has hundreds of calories in it. Rosa nods and heads back over to me, pulling her phone from her pocket " I found this when you were driving home. Does this sound like what you were describing?” I took Rosa's phone from her, speed reading the screenshot. It did sound a lot like me... but I still liked Teddy. I still wanted to go out on dates with him and stuff like that. "It is a sexual orientation, considered part of the LGBTQ community. What that means is, you are not broken, you may not feel sexual attraction, and that is completely normal.” I glance back up at Rosa “But I still like people, like, like like people…” Rosa perched herself next to me. “Sexual and romantic attraction are different. Not being sexually attracted and being romantically attracted to someone can be a thing.” I sigh, glancing back at the article before back up at Rosa “And this is real?” Rosa gives me a curt nod, making me smile a little. "Is it okay if I'm not sure?" Rosa rested her hand on my shoulder "Absolutely."

Closing my eyes, I leaned into Rosa's warm body, suddenly aware of how tired I was.

"Thanks, Rosa."

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short one :)
> 
>  
> 
> This isn't EXACTLY what happens in the original, it's just based off it. 
> 
>  
> 
> WARNING! FOLLOWING CHAPTER IS GRAPHIC

I wake with a start when I hear knocking on Rosa's door, who's asleep next to me. I sit up, stretching out before making my way over to the door. Standing on my tip toes, I press my eye against the peephole. It's Teddy. "Amy, I know you're in there. Let me in. I just want to talk." Staggering backwards, my mouth works for a second before yelling for Rosa. "Amy, that's your voice. Look, you don't have to be scared; just let me in."

What the fuck do I do? Do I call the police? Does this situation warrant police attention? I could lose my job if it's not bad enough. Not to mention it's a massive waste of resources and taxpayers money.

"Amy? What's wrong?" I turn around to see Rosa standing next to me. My mouth works for a second before I give up trying to speak and point at the door. "Is he-?" I nod, watching as Rosa's face hardens. "Come here." She whispers, taking my hand and leading me through the apartment to her panic room. "You'll be safe in here, okay?" I nod as she gently pushed me in "I'll come to get you when the coast's clear."

Once Rosa locks the door behind me, I perch myself on a nearby seat. I can't help but pull my phone out. It's not that I don't trust Rosa, it's just I don't trust Teddy. He's dangerous, and I'm probably justified in calling the police. There's no signal, so I dance around for a bit until I hear a loud crash followed by a yelp. I'm probably overreacting. This is Rosa Diaz we're talking about. But I know I couldn't live with myself if something happened to her and I was too busy hiding to help. After all, I am an NYPD police officer. I shouldn't be fucking hiding. Unlock the door to the panic room; I head out to investigate.

I've never noticed before how dark Rosa's apartment is when there are no lights on, even with streetlights and fluorescent signs lighting up the streets surrounding us.

I find Rosa collapsed in the hallway, clothes ripped off, Teddy on top of her, pinning her lifeless body down as he slides into it, grinning manically and moaning in between thrusts. I scream, running towards them, begging him to stop. _Amy_. "Don't be such a prude; she loves it really." _Amy_   "Unlike you, fat cow..." _Amy_

“Amy, sweetheart, wake up,”

Warm hands.

“Amy, you’re safe. Wake up.”

My mouth opens, gasping for air as I sit up frantically. I scan the room, looking for him, trying to figure out what just happened, when a hand brushes against my side. Instinctively, I flinch, withdrawing myself to the corner of the bed and curling into a tight ball as I sob.

When I unravel myself, Rosa's turned the light on and is sat with her feet dangling over her side of her bed, back to me. I don't know when she moved me from the sofa, but I don't ask.

"Can I come closer?"

I nod, licking my dry lips as I pant. Rosa shuffles back into her side of the bed, pausing before reaching for my hand. “Respira, respira,” she whispers, pressing my hand to her chest "Follow my breaths." Rosa's chest steadily rises and falls as she takes a few deep breaths. It's oddly comforting. My mind wonders a little as it tries to process what I'd just experienced, but in the end, it always returns its attention to the feeling of Rosa's chest rising and falling under my hand. “It was just a dream, chica,” she murmurs, wiping a few of my tears away.

Thank God for that. I think to myself as I rest my head on Rosa's shoulder, Rosa pulling the blanket around us. We stay like that for a while, me using Rosa as a pillow while she traces little circles on my hand with her finger and whispers her reassurances until I can breathe properly again.

  
Eventually, Rosa's alarm goes off to signal it's 7 am. "Are you okay if I go make us some coffee?" I nod, nuzzling into her chest and inhaling her sweet scent before letting her get out of bed. I consider heading out after her, but I figured after spending the last three hours calming me down she needed space. Instead, I roll over and stare at the ceiling, counting the little notches in the wallpaper.

When I look away, Rosa's standing next to me with a tray of pancakes in her arms. "Want some?" I shake my head. Pancakes are great, but carbs aren't a good breakfast. "Suit yourself," Rosa mutters as she sits down. Her tone takes me a little by surprise, but its oddly reassuring. It feels more 'her' than the woman she'd been recently.

Rosa lets me rest my head on her shoulder as she eats her breakfast, and I can't help but drool a little over the intoxicating smell of syrup. Maybe that was her plan. Once she's finished, there's a small square of syrup drizzled pancake left. Without saying anything, she pushes the tray towards me. I hesitate, Teddy's words sticking in my mind. "It's okay." She whispers, leaning into me slightly. It wasn't. It really wasn't. I was tempted to eat a carb for breakfast. "Are you hungry?" I nod, and before I know it, I've dipped my finger in the syrup and am holding it up to my lips, sniffing it. I wait for Rosa to complain about how gross I'm being, but she doesn't. Instead, she smiles. "Está bien, chica."

I'm just about to try it when the phone rings.

Rolling her eyes, Rosa grabs her phone from the bedside table, and answers it, insantly transforming back into the Rosa I know so well.

"Diaz."

"Yep."

A look of sheer relief crosses over Rosa's face, and I instantly find myself hoping it is what I think it is.

"Shut up for a second."

I giggle lightly as Rosa holds her phone to her shoulder, turning to me. "Teddy has been arrested." I nod slowly, my chest getting heavier as each second passed. "He confessed."

I instantly release my breath, shoulders sagging as I tumble back into the pillows behind me.

  
Teddy confessed.


End file.
